Randomness is mostly for rabbits. One minute you are munching away in field full of carrots & then bosh!! You are grabbed by some huge bird’s claws & pretty much fucked & bamboozled! In our world things are not so random. I am one of these guys who think that there must be a reason for everything. Things don’t just happen. God does not throw dice (?)

The necker brothers
The necker brothers

Right now a whole bunch of stuff is happening that appear to be totally unrelated. First, the US election & the fact that we have 2 contenders running pretty even with one another. The selection of Kerry was no accident. There were talks of the previous First Lady, Hillary Clinton representing. But some how it did not happen. If it had then the current race would not have been so neck & neck. This is the typical way our systems, modern Western Democracies, are designed to deal with shitty situations. Sit on the fence. Go for the middle. Neither here nor there. This way we get to hear about an endless debate of the legality of the damn thing in the first place. I refer to Mr. Liberal America Michael Moore. This chap is now the champion of opposition to the current US government. He supports Kerry & just can not figure out nor understand Where did we go wrong ? He asked unknowingly, this has to be the damnest & rudest question in the world ever!! The answer to this is a simple one. America went wrong from its very early days. The Wild West & all that. From the genocides against the Native Americans, to Slavery, Vietnam & general interference in every other nations affairs; politically, culturally, militarily & economically.

Uncle S

In this fantastic arena we have this war thing going on with Iraq. Well, is it a war? Who knows. The guys at United Nations certainly don t. We were told about Saddam s evil ways, which we tolerated & the absolute necessity of going after the little fucker. But guess what. There was no weapons. But the war still goes on. The chaos & the murders still take place & the soldiers are still like sitting ducks doing traffic duty In central Baghdad. The truth of it is that the American government needs to pre occupy itself with bullshit. This war is not about our terrible need to control terrorism. The CIA said there were no connections. This war is about distraction & nothing more. Our guy, Saddam, seem to have had it under control & operating under certain mandates from outside. He was certainly no threat when we were selling the damn stuff to him. Definitely no threat when he was gasing people at the borders with Iran.

Please trust me

There is also the Europeans. France, Germany & the gang. With the Yank friendly allies the Brits. The reluctant Blair who wants everyone to love him & for history not to bugger him, as they did with John Major. The moves within Europe are amazing. We are talking a joint European armed force, huge home economy with its own currency & the historical reliance on previous colonial ties being refreshed one way or another to generate fresh allies, since the Americans have failed miserably of convincing the rest of the world that Coca Cola & McDonalds are not good nutritious foods. Who knows the United Nations, a defunct institution of zillion double standards, may well want to claim political asylum in Europe. I can see Koki Anan pleading for mercy in Dover for fear of life the other side of the water.

Missing in action

Then there is this Arafat guy. The old two timer who worked ever so well with President Anwar Sadat of Egypt & President Carter of America. They all got on so well & agreed so much with each other that they decided to give one another Noble Peace prizes. I would do the same if I agreed with everyone around me. But Arafat is sick now. This apparently happened over night. First reports came as stomach cancer but this has changed to possible leukaemia in less than 24 hours. But the most important thing is that he is so sick that he got to leave Ramallah, to join wife & family in Paris. This will leave an inevitable short term vacuum. Better still the perfect long term excuse. This way he has not been toppled, killed or forced to go any where. He will not be seen as a man who left the battle field. Actually, I nearly forgot, he couldn t leave. He has been surrounded at the PLO head quarters for 2 years anyway. The only thing that went wrong with the PLO thing was Mr Sharon Vs Mr Arafat. These guys do not like one another at all. They have disliked each other since the 80 s in the South Lebanon invasion of the 80 s. Right now the pair of them are in the way of progress . One has to go. The weaker link is Arafat. The polite exit: sickness. There will be a leadership thing within the PLO & the old man will live in Europe for the rest of his days giving the occasional interview.But we got to remember that last guy who was so easily & quickly allowed to stay in Paris, after deportation from Iraq was Khomeini. That was definitely no accident either.

I’m hungry

Back in Israel we have the Fat Man. Ariel Sharon, who by any measure should be up for war crimes. But right now is in charge of Israel. The Fat Man has good connections. He understands fascism so well. They even put on fashion shows by the new wall that is being built round the West Bank. The Middle Eastern concentration camp. The rest of the world just stands by & says little. This was Hitler’s trick by the way. He was no accident either. Sharon s days look numbered as well. The Likud party will try & circumcise him again for taking out the illegal settlers out of Gaza, which he partly put there. So he looks like he is part of history too. He is even more irrelevant than Arafat/Bush & Osama put together. Here is a guy who marries the sister of his wife after she died!! Please. Give us some credit! Good bye Mr Fat Man.

I hate my dad!

Now we bring in a stupid looking man. Osama Bin Laden. The world s greatest runner of all time. This is the guy who can run faster than twice the speed of sound. He can hide better than the slipperiest of snakes. Also the world s biggest clown & greatest liar. He is so full of bullshit that he could be easily signed by Sony as the Saudis best Hip Hop artist. Basically, we have a very funny looking guy who can bitch without screaming. I still do not believe that he had much to do with 9-11. But through continuous repetition we can eventually start believing that he was responsible. I heard what he was saying & how desperately he tries t take credit to increase his hard core-ness. I am not personally convinced. If I saw him I would just slap him & tell him to shut it Osama. I may even give him a kick in the arse. However, he serves our purposes real well. He hates the western thing because he likes the Islamic thing. He is really old fashioned & pissed off with his dad & uncle as well. He is an angry man. Not stupid but not capable of organising & masterminding such intricate global events & reactions. The 9-11 thing is not much different to any of the the IRA campaigns in the UK. They do their own thing independently & that s why we can not beat the little fuckers. Osama is just a screaming bitch. He is not the problem nor is he the cause. He is just another symptom. But we need him & Bush needs him more. To continue a war & multiple illegal occupations of countries like Afghanistan & Iraq, we must have a culprit to chase. If any multitudes of kids get killed by us in the process we can blame the whole thing on this one man. But we can not catch him or the game will end there & then. He also He fits the bill perfect & he is also quite alternative.

I’m tired of this shit.

So there we have the new socio-political solution. We need a clean slate. A fresh start. New faces. Let the past rest & look to the future. There is hope & you too will have a local branch of McDonalds. This brave new world will have a slightly more US president, John Kerry. It will have Tony Blair & the rest of the Europeans in charge of most of what the US was monopolising. There will be no Fat Man in charge of Israel because we do not have an Arafat to represent (sell out) the Palestinians. Osama will probably marry some Chinese girl & become a Buddhist. The only thing that totally sucks is the fact that innocent kids, soldiers & individuals will suffer & die along side each other.



5 out of 5
5 out of 5

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